Shade's Page
I'm Shade. I guess you know that already because this is my page. This whole thing was Eva's idea. She says I can show the world that having mental or emmotional issues doesn't mean you're a stupid person, plus I can help other people who are sick or lost. It's too bad I didn't know Eva before the cops and doctors went to work on my brain. I think I used to be smart. At least, I got good grades in school. Now I have to question everything - every memory, even how to spell easy words. So I asked my new friend Frieda (you can meet her in Eva's second book) to check my spelling and I'm going to try to help.
Caveat
The resources on this page are the result of internet searches. Some are government sponsored and some are independent. I did not personally visit nor inspect any of them and can not vouch for their services.
I looked for places that were free, or low cost, and places I heard good things about.
If you use any of the resources on this page, you can share your experience annonymously via the authors' email link at the botton of the home page.
We all admire your courage in seeking help and wish you a safe and speedy journey.
Running Away
The first thing you should know about running away is that you can get yourself into all kinds of trouble on the street. So don't run without a plan. The second thing is - if you are living in a safe place, have enough to eat, and no one is trying to hurt you, you should really, really find a way to stay where you are until you can get a job and provide for yourself. There are lots and lots of bad people in the world who are waiting for you to end up on the street - helpless, defenseless, in need of food, shelter, protection. They will pretend to be your friend so you will trust them and then they will find a way to hurt you. I learned there are lots of ways for people to hurt each other. Lots of ways that you can't even think of if you are any kind of normal. And once you know these things or experience these things, you can't unknow them or forget your experience.
So, don't run if you are safe and well fed.
But if you are in a situation that is not safe in anyway - someone is trying to actively hurt you physically, emotionally, sexually, or passively hurt you (witholding food or medicine) - then you need to get out. But you don't want to blindly run to the streets.
If you are an adult, there are plenty of shelters, safe places where you can live while you get your life together. Just get there. Walk if you have to. Don't worry about your stuff. You don't need stuff to stay alive.
If you are not an adult, the trick is to find someone you can trust - an adult you can trust and who will be willing to help you. This is harder than it sounds. Adults like to think they are good judges of character. So people who already know the person or people you need to get away from, they won't help you because they won't believe you. Then there are the other people - people who are paid to help kids like you. Most of these people do the work they do because they want to help. A few of them do this kind of work to have access to their favorite prey - you. It is hard to tell the difference because everyone is nice - at first. The ones who want to help are overworked and underpaid. They are tired. They are tired of hearing from teenagers who believe that they can use the system to punish their parents for not letting them have enough money, stay up or out as late as they want, date or hang out with anytone they chose. So teens asking for help from the official system generally need some sort of proof. You also need to know that once you are in the system, you are what they call 'a ward of the court'. That means some judge or social worker will decide where and how you live. This is another reason you really shouldn't run away from a safe place. Some of them are nice enough to talk to you about choices. Some places even give kids lawyers or something called an Advocate. Other places will treat you like a criminal.
Good places to start - ask a teacher or school counselor what help is available. Use the yellow pages or the internet to look for shelters or homeless shelters in your area. Call them and ask about their services. Use the links on the right side of this page. If you are in immediate danger, call the police.
Mental Health
Well, I guess we all know I haven't exactly helped myself in this area. But good help is available when you are ready. I know it's confusing and emabarrasing when you don't understand what is happening around you, when you feel all jumpy and you know there's no reason, when you get lost in your own neighborhood.
But you don't have to live like that. There are people who understand and can help you get back to normal, or almost normal. If you can't understand your choices, please ask a family member or friend to help you find what you need. Please don't look for answers in alcohol or street drugs. I tried that. It doesn't work. It makes things worse.